Don’t Even Worry About It, I’m Reading Tyra Banks’s Modelland So You Don’t Have To

by renata

Yesterday was a great day! I got an email saying that the public library was holding a copy of Tyra Banks’s new YA novel Modelland for me! Today was an even better day! I got an ARC of Modelland from the Center for Children’s Books! (Never mind that it’s not really advance anymore since the final book is already out. It still feels cool and insider-y to have one.)

Modelland!!

The first novel from Bankable Books? Will there be more? I'm sure there will!

Much has been made about celebrities writing children’s books. Many have pointed out how offensive it is that celebrities think it is soo easy to write children’s books that they can just waltz in and write one. These people have a point; most books written by celebrities are not good. (Notable exceptions: … none. I can think of no exceptions.) So why do people keep buying them? Because we love celebrities. And celebrities will keep writing books, because we will keep buying them. So it goes!

Hilary Duff's Elixir

Do not read this book.

The last celebrity book I read was Elixir, by Hilary Duff. It was awful. Promise me that you will not read Elixir. If for some reason you feel overcome with the desire to read Elixir, here is how you can simulate the experience: tear a few random pages out of Twilight and a few pages out of The DaVinci Code. Staple them together in no particular order. Read them while drinking heavily, with an episode of Lizzie McGuire on in the background.

So my expectations for Modelland are extremely low. I’m still going to read it, though, because Tyra Banks is one of my all time favorite celebrities. America’s Next Top Model is probably my number one guilty pleasure. Tyra is the perfect combination of self-absorbed, trashy, and insane that makes for excellent television. And if Miss J ever wrote a children’s/YA book, you’d better believe I would read that, too.

Miss J

Anyway, I just started reading Modelland so this isn’t a full review. But I did want to share a tiny excerpt from the book’s prologue, just to give you all a sample of what a delight this book will be:

Nevertheless, you and every young girl in the world vie for an opportunity on the Day of Discovery, which is grander than every global holiday combined. Making the delirium even more intense, the Land sends seven talismans called SMIZEs into the world. (What an arcane word! Who though of such a thing?)

Oh Tyra, I see what you did there. (For those of you who do not watch America’s Next Top Model, why not? Do you think you’re too good for it? You aren’t. Anyway, though, “smize” is a word that Tyra has coined that means “smile with your eyes.” It is very important for models to smize.)

Smize!

Smize!

Hope you all have smize-filled weekends!

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